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nationalhazard.com
Monday, 30 November 2015

Now Playing: Conversations with Zoon

“I was watching the Rebarbarian debates the other day,” my friend Zoon said. “And I heard Mister Duck say that worker bees make too much money. Is that so?”

 

“If Mister Duck thinks something is true then it is true,” I said.

 

“But you are always worried about money,” Zoon countered. “ Are you worried that you have too much of it?”

 

“Yes,” I said. “I’ve earned too much money. You see, Zoon, it’s like this. If I had made less money then I wouldn’t have bought so much stuff; and if I hadn’t bought so much stuff I wouldn’t have gotten into so much debt. If I owed less then I would have more money to pay what I owe to The Super One Percent.”

 

“But if you and almost everyone else bought less,” Zoon said. “Wouldn’t that cause Big Brother Economy to crash?”

 

“Not at all,” I replied. “See, all the stuff that’s made in China can be bought by The Super One Percent. They won’t need it, of course, so they’ll ship it to Mexico where it can all be recycled.”

 

I heard Zoon’s tentacles twitch. He is from the planet Goonleopopfar and is, to humans, invisible; but I think that if I could see him he would look like a giant lobster.

 

“I do not understand the function of Big Brother Economy,” he said. “On our planet, if we need something we just get together and make it.”

 

“That’s insane!” I roared. “Worker bees can’t just get together and make stuff on their own. They have to be told what to do by Big Brother Economy.”

 

“I don’t think I get it,” Zoon sighed.

 

“Tell me,” I said.    


Posted by james-hazard at 12:10 PM PST
Updated: Monday, 30 November 2015 12:13 PM PST

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